How to prove separation date for divorce in Germany?

If you want to file for divorce, you must complete the separation year (Trennungsjahr). This means that you and your partner must no longer share a table and bed for 12 months. If your soon-to-be ex-partner claims something different during the divorce hearing, or if the court has doubts, you should be able to present evidence. It is important that you have somehow expressed your intention to separate and that your partner could understand it. Claiming that you completed the separation year while your partner was in prison or in a coma does not count. Read here more about the possible ways how to prove the separation date for your divorce in Germany.

Is it possible to prove a separation (year) under one roof?

Completing the separation year in the same appartment is possible. You can share bath room and kitchen but you need to have your own living room, and are not allowed to use one shared room at a time.

If you have separated within your marital home, the separation date is the day on which you occupied a separate space within the home and agreed on how to use the premises of the home overall.

What if the spouses assume different separation dates that both are more than a year ago?

If you and your spouse assume different separation dates, the difference becomes irrelevant if, according to both of your statements, the separation year has been completed. For instance, if you claim to have separated on February 10, 2023, while your partner states March 10, 2023, the discrepancy does not matter if you file for divorce a year later, for example, from March 10, 2024. The separation year has expired in either case.

6 ways to prove the separation date in Germany

In general, it should be sufficient to indicate the date of separation in the divorce application. However, there are situations where it is not sufficient. For example, if your spouse rejects the idea of separation or believes that your marital community still exists or has continued beyond the separation period you specified. To avoid this risk, it is advisable to document the date of separation from the outset and have evidence on hand in case it is needed. 

There are various options available for this purpose. Some are like going the security path; they are waterproof. Others are okay, and some still are risky - in the end it is your decision which way fits best for your individual situation.

OK: Excerpt from the Marital Residence 

Most often, one spouse moves out of the marital residence, for example, returning to their parents' home for 1 year. This makes the separation itself apparent. In case of a dispute, however, it could still be difficult to prove this point in time, especially if you do not register under the new address. 

WATERPROOF: Registration with the registration authority

If you change your place of residence due to separation, you are obligated to provide your new address to the registration office. You will receive a registration certificate. The day of registration allows conclusions to be drawn about the time of separation.

RISKY: Evidence by a witness

If there are third parties who can testify to your separation, they may be considered as witnesses. A new partner with whom you have moved in together or entered into a new residence is also a potential witness. 

However, if your child is emotionally affected by your separation, it is not necessarily advisable to use them as a witness for your evidence.

And please take note that also a new relationship can end, and people can change minds.

RISKY: Compose and send a separation letter by yourself

You can write a separation letter and send it to your spouse by snail mail. In it, you explain that you want to permanently separate. You don't need to adhere to a specific format or use specific wording. You simply express that you wish to separate. Whether you subsequently file for divorce is another question. With your communication, you are only describing the legally required separation from bed and board. You make it clear that your domestic partnership no longer exists, and you have no intention of restoring your marital cohabitation.

For proof of receipt of your mail by the recipient, it is advisable to use a registered letter with acknowledgment of receipt. With the presentation of the delivery receipt and a copy of the delivery receipt, the evidence of the first appearance suggests that the letter was received by the recipient through the insertion into the mailbox. 

However, if the recipient claims that the mail never reached him, for example, because a mail thief is active in his building, this option carries a residual risk. A delivery confirmation letter could also be futile, as the recipient is allowed to refuse acceptance.

WATERPROOF: Having a separation letter sent by a lawyer

It is simpler and safer if you hire an attorney to inform your spouse of the separation and to record the separation date in the letter. The lawyer's letter is an important document that the attorney can also attest to. The statement of an attorney is usually given significant weight, as the consequences of a false statement weigh much heavier for an attorney than for "ordinary citizens."

WATERPROOF: Proving separation with a request for legal aid

If you have little or no income, you can apply for state legal aid (Verfahrenskostenhilfe) in conjunction with your divorce petition. Since the family court sends the divorce petition along with the VKH application to the spouse for comments, the spouse will be informed at the latest upon receipt of the VKH application that you desire separation and do not wish to maintain your marital cohabitation any longer. Conclusions regarding the time of separation can also be drawn from this.

Early assistance from a lawyer makes sense for you

You now know 6 ways to prove the separation year and the separation date. You may notice that the safest methods are successful with the help of a lawyer. For your divorce, you need a lawyer as the applicant anyway, and it won't cost you much to engage one at the time of separation. 

Our law firm is one of the most experienced divorce law firms nationwide and we would be happy to guide you through your divorce proceedings with skill and intelligence. Feel free to send us a message for a free consultation so that we can provide you with an initial assessment of your situation. 

As a foreigner, you may not be as familiar with German law, or your partner may have incorrect assumptions about the separation year - in that case, we can help. Especially if you are living under the same roof, you should actually have spent a full 365 days separated. Courts inquire rigorously about this in the hearing, and it is better if your divorce application comes through with the help of good evidence for a correct separation year and does not get rejected with costs.

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